Hi, I’m Carmela. I’m a sobriety coach, writer and content creator, and the person behind Woman on a Sober Mission. If you’ve come from Instagram, you’ll already know that my sobriety journey is the reason this entire platform exists. If you’ve found me through the web, I’m really glad you’re here.
For more than five years I’ve been alcohol free, and the community I built through @womanonasobermission has played a huge part in keeping me accountable, inspired and connected. What started as a private space to help me stay sober has grown into a place where thousands of women come to rethink their relationship with alcohol and find a sense of clarity and strength again.
I live in the Essex countryside with my husband and my son, Luca. When I’m not writing about sobriety or coaching women through early alcohol free living, I work as an Event Director, leading national exhibitions and content programmes in the UK. I recently launched a national event for the Emergency Services sector and have won multiple awards both personally and for my events. My work life is full, fast paced and creative, and you will often see me talking about the events industry across my platforms because it shapes so much of who I am.
Outside of work I’m obsessed with movement. I train CrossFit and Hyrox, lift weights, and love anything that builds strength and resilience. I spend as much time outdoors as possible, whether that’s wild swimming, walking, or pottering at my allotment growing fruit, vegetables and flowers.
For years I lived with anxiety, depression and a difficult relationship with alcohol. Drinking was the thread running through my twenties and thirties, from the party girl phase with no off switch to the exhausted working mum who poured another glass every night to cope. Like so many women, I fell into the trap of thinking it was normal, that it was stress relief, that it was everyone else’s idea of balance.
It wasn’t. It was slowing destroying my health and my confidence, and I knew it.
My wake-up call came when my friend Sarah was diagnosed with breast cancer in her thirties. Watching her fight so hard for her health while I was slowly sabotaging my own forced me to stop and take a long look at my life. She documented her journey and it made me question everything about how I was living. It planted the seed for change, even though I didn’t get sober straight away.
I tried to quit alcohol many times. Each attempt taught me something and brought me a little closer. I didn’t use AA, although I respect anyone who does. It just didn’t feel like my path. I wanted a space that felt modern, open and free of labels.
In July 2020, during the pandemic, I decided to try again. That time it stuck. I found other sober women online, I began sharing honestly and I started documenting every single day. It became my accountability and, without realising it, the lifeline that changed everything.
On day two of my sober journey I found out that Sarah had passed away. Instead of drinking to cope, I made a decision. I would honour her by creating a life that was healthier, happier and more meaningful than the one I’d been living. I would stop numbing myself. I would live fully.
Today I support women who want to change their relationship with alcohol, whether they are sober curious, starting from day one or already alcohol free and wanting to deepen their mindset and lifestyle shifts. I’m a qualified coach and I use a non-judgemental, self-led approach because that’s the route that worked for me.
I write about sobriety, mindset, fitness and what it really means to rebuild your life as a woman in her forties. I also speak publicly about alcohol, mental health and performance, and I’ve been featured in national newspapers and magazines sharing my story.
I know how lonely early sobriety can feel, especially when you don’t fit the stereotype or you haven’t hit rock bottom. I didn’t either. I simply knew alcohol was holding me back from the life I wanted. And I know there are so many women quietly feeling the same.
If my story, my tools or my honesty helps even one woman take her next step, it’s worth it.
If you want daily support, you can follow me on Instagram at womanonasobermission. If you want to understand more about my journey or explore coaching, feel free to look around the site and reach out.
We all deserve a life that feels clear, grounded and fully ours.
